One resident's words on Brilliance Inside's impact on his life

When I first became involved with Brilliance Inside, I was a shell of a man.  I was a broken, nihilistic heroin addict who had no self-esteem and no hope for the future.  My existence was a miserable self-destructive myopia that seemed to be going nowhere.  I not only had no hope for the future, but no plans and no desire to create any.  I was content to waste away into nothing. I was completely detached from reality, from humanity, from responsibility and from myself.  I didn’t know who I was, and I had not the slightest idea of what I’d just signed up for.

The compassion, wisdom and nurturance of this organization’s members were so foreign to me that, initially, I was horrified by these people.  I didn’t know how to deal with individuals to whom love and kindness were second nature, from whom intention and competence palpably radiated.  It was unlike anything I’d ever experienced before.  Brilliance Inside went on to ignite change in me in ways which I find it difficult to even attempt to express.  It only took a few months of their influence to make me realize that the way I was living was unacceptable.  I had a shift in heart so intense that at the time, I didn’t understand what was happening to me.  Looking back on it now, the best way I can describe it is this:  I wanted to be a person again.

Diving headfirst even more deeply into their program has, undoubtedly, been the most rewarding experience of my life.  These people created an environment in which I felt safe enough to face the darkest depths of my past, to be open and vulnerable about things that I thought I would take to my grave.  They taught me what it means to have healthy relationships, to care about myself, to love.  They showed me that every person on the planet has brilliance inside of them just waiting to be illuminated.  They’ve helped me to heal more than I ever thought I could, to become a man who is often unrecognizable to myself and others.  But perhaps most importantly, they showed me what it means to be human.

Today, I haven’t touched heroin in 2 ½ years.  I’m the healthiest I’ve ever been mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually.  I’m continuing to learn and grown more every day, trusting in the fact that I am loved and that all people, regardless of who they are and what they’ve done, are worth of love as well.

Now, I’m actively participating in more rehabilitative programs than I ever have time for.  I’m setting goals and achieving them on a regular basis and working every day towards my ultimate goal of being released and having a positive impact on society.  I volunteer as a guitar player in four different bands as well as the church worship service.  I make a conscious effort to be friendly to everyone (even the people whom I don’t care for), and I frequently find myself daydreaming about all of the ways I want to change the world.  I see now that I have value, that I have a gift inside of me to bring to humanity, and the innumerable ways in which I can do that are an endless source of inspiration.

I am eternally grateful.  I wouldn’t trade my time with Brilliance Inside for anything in the world.