Words from Prison: Appreciation, one sign at a time

Showing appreciation one sign at a time by Zacharia Arteaga

Bold emphasis added.  All other emphasis, smiley faces, added capitals, etc. are original.

Nearly a month ago, I started to get burdened with what the news was showing.  A lot of protests, which I’m not against; but the ones done ungraciously and aggressively burdened me.

Burdened, I realized something needed to be done.  Something needed to either direct the flow of our demand on changing the police and racism and all the hate issues… Or something needed to create a new flow…

I’d soon discover it would be the latter in which I would be ambitiously taking head on.

I fought and fought internally… I decided “I’m going to do it.”

With segregated building, we went out for yard.  During this pandemic, I’ve been facilitating on our night yards, a night of worship.  When we come out altogether and fellowship, sing and group-style reflect through questions.

I used this opportunity to inform everybody [of my idea] and ask for support.  Rather than a protest, let’s gather with handmade signs in front of the program office and the gate and tell all the staff, medical, psych’s, C.O.’s, etc. “Thank you…You are Worthy!...You are Loved!...Don’t give up on us.”

I was laughed at that night… It hurt…. I individually ask our TEDx family, relaying our charismatic intent of sowing seeds of change!  I was heavily doubted, laughed by a few and told by one how “unbiblical” I was being.

Only my cellie – who’s part of our TEDx family – helped me.  By even then I think he felt obligated.   I’m kidding, he was totally free.

I scheduled it to happen in two weeks…. Surprisingly, I got a lot of support, and necessary conversations from people I least expected.  I eventually gathered a strong ten people…. Counting my cellie and I, twelve.

I was burdened with doubt but, for some reason [his brilliance!], I just kept moving.  I kept declaring over my heart, making louder my belief than the very doubt within me.

It was nearing shift change [when the highest number of staff and C.O.s are on the yard], we prayed and immediately caught the first nurse walking out.  I yelled “Thank you!” holding up my sign.  And then we all just came alive!  My cellie knocked on all the medical building windows, getting everyone’s attention.  We witnessed all the staff passing [outside the gate from] their [respective] yards stopping in disbelief as we went Crazy! Ha!

We witnessed nurses stop and tear up, C.O.s stop and tear up.  [The Captain] came out and took photos of us.  All the while, I maintained the grease in our gears.  While our sign holders were shouting praise and speaking faith over own prison, I was building them up as they’d weaken and exhausted.  It’s not every day you stand for two and a half hours straight, telling the prison staff “You are love and thank you.”

Oh!  By the way, if you build it, they will come!  We eventually go to nearly 40 people shouting praise to all the staff.  And, of those forty, were many of the people that doubted.  It was beautiful!!

It wasn’t their fault for doubting.  Instead, it was my responsibility to show them it’s okay to believe….  It’s okay to be bold.

I saw those doubters so happy, shouting praise and holding signs alongside us.  Even got in the pictures!    I dismissed the “in your face” attitude.”  Hallelujah….  I saw what my brilliance was made to be about…. That day more so than I ever had before.  I’m to help people believe… again.

I do not like pain, but I discover in pain, there’s ignition for passion.  I definitely do not want to thank anyone for doubting in me or not saying anything at all, which sometimes hurts just as much as saying the wrong thing… But, the spiral of my own insecurities [this] took me down showed me the real fight… The real change…

I want my brilliance to take me deeper in this real fight.  The fight to believe that change is possible.  And it can be done through you and me.